Sally Mooney's - A Precious Box
- Sally tells how she unwillingly became part of an urban holy pilgrimage
A Precious Box
When I heard that the relics of
St. Therese of Lisieux were coming to the church in my New Orleans
neighborhood, I braced myself. I knew this meant traffic and parking
problems and a whole lot of hype. The local news couldnt seem
to get enough of it, triggering a memory from my childrens
grade-school days. A Catholic mother had told me her newborn fourth
childs name with the cryptic comment, We had to have
a Theresa. Now I understood what she had meant.
I was determined to rise to the
occasion, to let the local culture strut its stuff with a minimum
of grousing on my part. I vowed not to guard my parking place with
garbage cans on leaving for work, in the mean-spirited way of those
who live near the fairgrounds when Jazz Fest opens, or those Californians
with beachfront homes who extend their property lines into the ocean.
Modern-day pilgrims need parking spaces too, I reminded myself,
and willingly hiked a block and a half from my car to my front door
at the end of the day.
Then the six oclock newsman
warned us the church would be open all night, to accommodate the
faithful. I could feel my own pledge to accommodate waver, so I
sought an analogy, imagined Lucys bones on display at Tulane,
and myself hell-bent to see them. Theresa and Lucy, the Carmelite
and the caramelized. As far as I could tell, there wasnt much
difference. I decided to see what all the fuss was about.
I enlisted my son, Chris, to accompany
me. In some irrational way, I sensed the churchs authority,
its power like that of the awesome sea, and felt the need to buddy-up.
We queued outside St. Dominics, trying unsuccessfully to blend.
I just couldnt muster that beatific glaze the other women
were wearing. Im tense and edgy, having too long juggled kids
and work and long commutes. And Chris is hairy. His highschool friends
dubbed him Chewy, in reference to Star Wars Chewbaca,
and in this line he looked like a testament to Darwin.
When we got inside, I saw an old
neighbor who was serving as an usher. Her son used to come by our
house on muggy summer days after church camp in his July for
Jesus tee shirt to play with my young heathens, and she knew
I wasnt Catholic. I remembered my mother and I yuking it up
over that tee shirt when she came to visit, but now the tables were
turned. I almost panicked moving two by two with some ancient woman
toward the altar. Chris had slipped behind, and I couldnt
see what lay ahead. Even worse, everyone was chanting in sync with
loud speakers churning out Hail Marys, and neither of us knew the
words. A child of the fifties, I could have held my own if it had
been the Lords Prayer or the 23rd Psalm, since in those days
we chanted and prayed in public schools every morning. I dont
think Chris knew so much as Jesus Loves Me, my base
line for religious literacy. And I wouldnt have either if
it hadnt been for school. My father was compulsively sacriligious.
If someone was tone deaf, he would say, He couldnt sing
Come to Jesus in the key of C. If an old friend
dropped by, hed say, I havent seen you since Christ
was a corporal. I had to shift gears when I went to school
in the morning, like a kid growing up bi-lingual.
We had been given little cards with
St. Thereses picture when we entered the church, and as we
reached the altar I noticed people rubbing their cards on the outside
of the plastic case protecting the relics. I didnt know what
that was all about, so I just looked. Inside the plastic bubble
was a beautiful boxlike something out of a Hollywood pirate
flickits deep, rich wood girded with gold bands, a real objet
dart that would have been at home on the third floor of the
art museum with the Faberge eggs. But I couldnt get any farther
than that to feel the mystery or spirit or whatever the woman behind
me was feeling as she lifted her child up and showed her how to
slide her card along the casing. As I passed out the door I looked
back to see Chris rubbing his card with the rest of them. If I had
been anywhere else but in that church, I would have laughed out
loud. But then we learned that having rubbed his card, he was now
in possession of a certified relicin a kind of gilt by associationwhereas
I had just a postcard. Today as I look at the picture of St. Therese,
Im not sure if its Chriss or mine, the real thing
or the mere image of a fifteen-year-old nun who died of tuberculosis
in 1897 saying, as the legend goes, Im not dying, Im
entering into Life.
When we got back to the house, I
plunged into algebra with my daughter, Kate, who had an exam in
the morning. She was about as out of place in her Honors Math class
as Chris and I had been at that altar, and I was getting worried
about the night ahead. She needed her sleep to cope with that exam,
and I needed mine to make it to the one I was giving in the morning.
But the pilgrims kept on coming. From my room on the street-side
I lay awake listening to car doors, and voices, and the click of
high heels. To make it worse, every time a door slammed, my dog
would bark. Somehow I finally drifted off, only to be jarred awake
by church music blaring from St. Dominics towers. I couldnt
believe what I was hearing, nor the fact that my clock read 1 a.
m. Chris had heard it too, though Kate miraculously stayed asleep,
and the two of us had had it. I stuffed my nightgown into my jeans,
threw on a jacket and set off up the block, thinking of a lifetimes
unrequited gestures
the lint screens Id cleaned in apartment-house
dryers and the coated ones Id found left for me, the picnic
tables Id washed on vacating a campsite, and the sticky ones
Id arrived to find, the dog poops Id scooped and the
ones Id stepped in
all that doing unto others, and now,
the last straw, that parking place Id sacrificed paid back
in organ notes, my tolerance flowing up a one-way street.
Harrison Avenue looked surreal at
this hour, all lit up with church ladies milling about in some weird
parody of Bourbon Street. A patrol car waited on the neutral ground
across from the church with two officers like bouncers or hawkers,
I wasnt sure which. I walked up and asked them, Is the
Catholic church above the law? They were startled, and I had
to ask again. Is the Catholic church above the law? Because
Ive got an exam at 8 in the morning, and Id like to
sleep. If I played my music at 1 a. m. on a school night, youd
be knocking at my door to turn it down. To my surprise, the
policemen agreed that the music was unnecessary and promised to
cut it off. I walked back home and for four and a half hours slept
the sleep of the just.
The next morning wasnt half
bad. At least I was getting out early enough to avoid the chaos
of the ten oclock procession carrying Thereses box from
St. Dominics to Mount Carmel, several blocks away. And I must
admit I felt a glow from having taken on Rome and lived to tell
about it. On my morning commute I noticed a familiar bumper sticker
on the car ahead of meThink Globally, Act Locallywhich
seemed this morning to have gotten it wrong. The Catholic church
had no problem thinking bigglobally, even cosmicallybut
it had lost all sense of the local, couldnt see itself as
a building in a neighborhood, adjacent to houses with people inside,
couldnt imagine the lives behind those doors, the single mothers
making grocery lists and the girls learning algebra. It was calibrated
for the big event, the arrival of relics in a gilded box, or the
judgment day, which for St. Therese marked not the end, but the
beginning of life, Life capitalized, the real thing.
Then I thought about that box and
just what had been inside that would sum up the person who had been
Therese. Her habit and her rosary beads? I remembered the Box of
Precious Things that my brother, Tom, had kept since the day he
found it, an old jewelry box, in a garbage can when he was eight
years old. In it, he had a picture of his best friend, Jan; a chunk
of Jan s original pigeon coop; the first woodshaving he had
made in wood shop; his milk teeth; a Lucky Lager bottle cap with
a bullet hole shot through it; the tip of the garden hose he had
brought along when we moved from Louisville to Tempe, Arizona, in
1959; the jaws of a walleyed pike and the Canadian Jig Fly hed
caught it on; a twenty centavo piece that he and Jan had put on
the railroad tracks to flatten it; a firecracker from a long trip
to Mexico in 1963; an old guitar pick from 1966 or so that he had
found inside our piano; a beer bottle opener he had used during
the year he lived in Mexico; a piece of the shirt he had worn when
he first soloed an airplane; and a scrap of paper on which he had
written, John Lennon Died Today.
All that small stuff, it seemed
to me, had captured the essence of a life well livedan ordinary
lifeone deserving of an upper case L, a spot on the local
news, and a procession of humanists filing by (during working hours,
in sensible shoes) to celebrate what its really all about.
With that thought, I eased on into the grind of just another day
in New Orleans.
Sally Cole Mooney
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